…An episode of Really-Weird-Things-I-Learned-This-Week.
Yes, your eyes do not deceive. That is indeed a pubic wig, a merkin, and that tiny black device at the top is a flashlight. Well, why not? If you’re spending money on a new wig, you might as well make sure it’s multipurpose! I’d never heard of a merkin until I *ahem* randomly came across the term whilst searching Google for something else. Don’t give me that look, lol. I certainly don’t use Google to find naked pics on the web O_o Anyway, my first thought was this is a new fad following closely on the heels of the vajazzle. But I was wrong. Turns out these lil toupees have been around since around 1450. According to Wikipedia, they were originally used by prostitutes for either hygiene or subterfuge purposes (hiding their level of health, apparently). They were also used by actors playing female roles.
These days, they’re often still used by actors to customize their nether regions for whatever movie they’re filming. Can’t very well have a landing strip if you’re filming a movie set in the ’40s I suppose. Okay, here are some of my ideas for this growing trend—or should I say regrowing???
How about a Paracord merkin? Not sure how you’d attach it, but if you had a good mat of Paracord, you could make snares, replace shoelaces, or construct a shelter from it. I’ve seen a tuxedo merkin, but I can’t figure out any realistic use for it. I mean, I don’t really go to formal events. A merkin with a money pocket might be handy if you had to wear a dress with no bra to tuck your bills into. An all-furry merkin could keep you warm in cold-weather conditions. If you add fangs, it could work like a chastity belt. I’d be scared. Just sayin’.
That’s enough of my silliness. Feel free to share your crazy ideas on a new merkin design. Now really, am I the only one who has never heard of this before? I feel so unenlightened! Did anyone learn anything else interesting this week?
PS—I also learned that turtles can breathe through their rears, chickens outnumber humans on the planet, and lightning strikes the earth about 8 million times per day. My interpretation: I’ve known a lot of “turtles” in my life, I need to eat more chik’n, and opportunity can come along anytime, anywhere. There’s a lot of lightning to go around.