Hey Chicks and Roosters! How’s everyone’s summer been going? Not as hot as the books on your bedside tables, I hope! ;) Today, we have a special treat for you, a Chick Crasher! Please welcome my friend, the lovely and talented, and soon-to-be new momma, S. L. Saboviec. Her debut release, GUARDING ANGEL, is an amazing fantasy with romantic elements that you just *have* to read! I’m still fangirling over this gorgeous cover *SQUEES*
Take it away, Samantha!
Greetings! I’m excited to be here, and I want to thank Chick Swagger for hosting me on the blog today. My topic isn’t quite as smexy as Josie’s recent post about masturbation or Rachael’s guide to dirty talking, but hopefully we’ll have some fun today. Since we’re all adults, I’m going to assume that most of us have experienced the joy that is pregnancy and/or know someone who has—specifically, the delightful side effects that go along with it.
Me? I’m over seven months along as of writing this. I’ve had a pretty smooth pregnancy, but sometimes I feel like a walking textbook of third trimester issues. My latest bane is cravings.
However, I haven’t had a true craving. Not the “It’s 3 a.m. and if I don’t have hot wings and chocolate cake, I will kill you, husband” kind. Instead, I have ideas that come into my head about what I want to eat, and I have yet to threaten my husband with death over them. Usually, I go out the next day and get the thing I want. See? Not really a craving.
Except one thing has become my white whale, the thing I just cannot seem to hunt down: Cake Batter ice cream.
My first option was Ben and Jerry’s Cake Batter flavor. After sending my husband on a store-to-store search, we were unable to find that flavor. (I will note that I’m skeptical at my dear husband’s devotion, but he said he tried.)
So then I visited Marble Slab. I discovered they have Birthday Cake, but my craving—I mean, moderate desire—wanted the Batter, not the finished Cake.
My next option was Cold Stone Creamery. Here in Canada, Tim Horton’s coffee shop chain bought the franchise. This was a good option because Tim’s is as proliferative as Starbucks, and one of their offerings, according to the website, is Cake Batter.
I went to the closest location only to find out that they only served coffee and pastries. I did a google search and discovered an article explaining that selling ice cream doesn’t fit with the Tim Horton’s image and they’d started shutting down all their locations.
What do I care if Tim Horton’s spent a bunch of money on purchasing an ice cream chain and shuts it down? Except that I wanted my Cake Batter ice cream. I forlornly drove to another one, hoping perhaps they weren’t all closed.
Nope, Cold Stone was a bust. Feeling jilted, I forgot about it. Moved on with my life.
Argh! Back came the craving in full force! I mean, desire. I don’t get cravings. It was a desire.
I decided to indulge. Nothing was going to stop me. I was on a quest from Mother Nature and my child, who, after all, was the one who benefited in this scenario. Right? Right.
Google maps informed me two Baskin Robbinses were located in town. I pulled into the parking lot of the closest and a rude sign proclaimed, “Sorry, We’re Closed.” Perplexed, I got out of my car to find a nastily-worded eviction notice on the Baskin Robbins door.
What kind of international food chain gets evicted from a strip mall?
Fine. I hopped back in my car and raced over to the other one, hoping that they hadn’t met the same fate.
Well, apparently, here in Oshawa, the franchise owner(s) were deadbeats. Shut down, closed up, no ice cream for me.
I was in a conundrum. The next Baskin Robbins was fifteen minutes away in the next town over, but I was starting to feel like a crazy pregnant woman, driving all over the countryside for ice cream. But this wasn’t about my not-craving anymore. It was the principle.
As I pulled into a parking spot, a smiling family with ice cream cones sauntered down the sidewalk. This was it. I would finally get my Cake Batter ice cream.
Inside, I waited in line, a tad embarrassed by the presence of me and my belly alone amongst the families with children, but I figured everyone would understand. Pregnant women need ice cream from time to time.
“What would you like?” asked the lovely girl behind the counter.
“Your flavor of the month is Cookies and Cake Batter, right?” Looking through the displayed ice creams, I didn’t see it. No need to panic, there was a whole case on the other side of the cash regis—
“No, I think that’s next month’s flavor,” said the pimple-faced little b&^#%. “We have Cow Dung and Baby Poop for this month.”
Well, obviously that’s not what she said, but at this point, I was feeling beyond absurd. It wasn’t even a craving. It was just a desire of a gal who tends to get fixated on stuff.
I got another flavor.
It just wasn’t the same.
As of this writing, a month has passed since I first got a crav—a desire to have Cake Batter ice cream, yet I have been heretofore unsuccessful.
Can anyone help me find some cake batter flavor lest tomorrow’s headline reads, “City Torn Apart By Pregnant Woman On Ice Cream Rampage”?
Samantha grew up in a small town in Iowa but now lives in the suburbs of Toronto with her Canadian husband and expatriate cat. In her spare time, she reads, writes, and thinks about reading and writing—along with playing the occasional video game or eight.
Find out more about her at www.saboviec.com.
Guardian angel Enael can’t seem to keep her human Wards in check. They’re the ones who choose their paths before reincarnating—she’s just there to help make sure they stay on track. But it’s not as easy as it might look.
When she meets and falls in love with charismatic Kaspen, a fellow Guardian, Enael’s feelings about Heaven, Hell, demons, and the life she’s known are turned upside down. Worse, angel-turned-demon Yasva, Kaspen’s former love, still holds him in her clutches. Even as Yasva works toward obtaining complete control of Earth, she taunts and haunts Kaspen’s and Enael’s lives.
Now Enael is forced to face her past (which is centuries long and bursting with secrets), her present (which is terribly unfulfilling and full of questions), and her future (which becomes more uncertain as time passes). Armed with a newfound love and fear of losing it all, she must figure out how to save the world—-and the angel she loves. Which side will win? Who will Kaspen choose? Will Heaven and Earth continue to exist, or will everything go to Hell?
Kindle US: http://amzn.to/1jTRde0
Kindle Canada: http://www.amazon.ca/dp/B00K6ZM372
Paperback (Amazon): http://amzn.to/1vjDguz
How about you? Got any crazy pregnant lady craving—I mean, desire—stories?